Its weekend time and I wanted to write something different from usual. Let me ask you one question. Can you decide to marry someone by just meeting that person for first time and you just have 2-3 hours to decide? Isnt it impossible? This is a common situation for any Indian boy or girl.

I feel many of you may not even know how actually arrange marriages happen. Arrange marriage involves a mediator who knows both boy and girl side of family. This person initiates the talk and then there is exchange of CV’s (we call it bio-data) and then matching horoscopes sometimes. If all goes ok, then exchange of pictures and then meeting is arranged between boy side and girl side. After meeting each other, boy and girl need to decide whether they want to marry each other or not. There could be different versions of story, but this is more or less the situation. Its sounds like a gamble right? You do not know anything about other person and you have to decide whether you want to marry or not.

Until sometime back, I used to think that I am lucky enough to find love after marriage. But in many cases people may not find love. Then I came across an article stating arrange marriages are more successful. When I spoke to my grandfather about this, he totally changed my mind I think what he said is correct. First thing he told me that in India, marriage is not only between 2 persons, but it is between 2 families. Successful marriage requires both sides to compromise on something’s. India is country with many cultures, traditions, festivals etc. If two people having very similar cultures, traditions, family values etc marry each other, then they do not need compromise much after marriage and two persons can understand each other better. As per him, this is the primary reason for arrange marriages being more successful.

Other possible reason could be lower expectation. I feel in love marriage you have higher expectation from other person, but in arrange marriage you do not. In recent times, no of arrange marriages are reducing and love marriages are increasing in India. And I heard from some Japanese people that arrange marriage used to be common in Japan as well, few decades ago.

What is your point of view?